physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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