i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
