break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
