question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
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