I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
