So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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