I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
