You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
