so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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