it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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