look no pants
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
did i just pee glitter
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
