i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
