Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
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When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
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I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize