Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
