remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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