just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize