Nicole vs. Life
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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