i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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