Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
