i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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