I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I could fuck to npr.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize