Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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