i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
