You smell like stripper and shame
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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