So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize