And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
