So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
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