WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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