AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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