Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
