i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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