MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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