Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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