So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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