yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
