remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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