your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
She needs sedatives and a leash
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Randomize
