She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
