goodnight i made you a song goodbye
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize
