he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
The power of my boobs compel you
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
how does that bad decision feel?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
