you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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