I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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