that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Randomize
