Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
