idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
