My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Randomize
