My brain says no but my pants say off.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
My day in three words: secret purse cake
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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