your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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