Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
