they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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