Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
