5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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