I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I wish life had little blips of pornography
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I want a musical about memes.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
